In Memoriam: Alda Louise Harris Kuhn

Alda Louise (Harris) Kuhn

Today marks the sixth anniversary of my mother's physical death … but my sister and I were robbed of the mom that we love to remember long before that as Alzheimer's slowly took her away from us. Mom loved to laugh, and her wonderful sense of humor will always be in our memories. She taught us little dittys like Mairzy Doats and poetry excerpts like My leg? It's off at the knee – and they still amused her even after her Alzheimer's had progressed considerably. At that time, while my sister and I were painting the outside of Mom and Dad's house prior to selling it, Mom would sit in a lawn chair watching us and laugh as we repeated the verses we had learned so many years ago.

Glenn & Louise

Mom was born 03 April 1925 off Fork Ridge in Marshall County, West Virginia, to Charles McClure and Dessie Charlotte (Aston) Harris. She and her future husband, Donald Glenn Kuhn, both attended the Fork Ridge Christian Church. On 11 June 1948 they went to Bellton, West Virginia, where they were married by Rev. Ister West in his home (his wife Edith J. West and neighbor Minnie F. Ealy served as witnesses).

Mom and Dad wanted children, but it would be seven years before I was born - long enough that Mom and Dad had been contemplating adoption. Their joy at my birth was offset by Mom's health issues that turned her world upside down. Although her life was a difficult one due to various illnesses and near-death, her determination and inner strength kept her going. Dad once told me that Mom said she had to survive to take care of her little girl - I was only two years old when she nearly died the first time.

And survive she did. A few years later, she and Dad were thrilled to find out that a second child would be arriving – but the doctor wasn't so thrilled due to Mom's health issues. Yet once again, determination and inner strength got Mom through the delivery and life went on.

I doubt if there were ever enough hours in a day for Mom. She loved to bake, sew, and make crafts of all kinds. Outside, she raised a garden and tended many flower beds. Mom loved to feed and care for animals – photos of her as a young girl often included cats, dogs, horses, even sheep. That love continued throughout her life with numerous dogs and cats.

Just like Dad, Mom was strong in her Christian faith; she loved to listen to gospel music, especially while she was working in the kitchen. Dad loved to sing hymns and gospel music – but I suspect Mom enjoyed listening to his singing even more.

It's hard to pinpoint exactly when Alzheimer's disease first started, but we can look back and see differences in the late 1980's.  Moving Mom to a nursing home was one of the hardest decisions our family ever faced, even though we knew we could no longer provide the level of care she required. So in 1999, we moved her to the Home of the Good Shepherd in Wheeling, West Virginia. Mercifully, our fear that she might want to return home never materialized - the Alzheimer's had destroyed her memories to the point that she gave no indication that she even realized a change had been made.

For a few more years, she continued to recognize both my sister and me, but it was Dad whose presence could make her eyes light up even after she could no longer speak. He was the love of her life, and he visited her every day. The staff at Good Shepherd all loved Mom and said that she was one of the sweetest patients they had. She retained her sense of humor for some time, and the nurses and aides loved it when she would laugh with them and smile.

Within a month of turning 80, Mom was finally called home by God.  (Ironically, her older sister, Eva Mae Harris Aston, was 80 when she had also died from Alzheimer's in 2002.)  When Mom passed away on 09 March 2005, she was surrounded by her family; Dad, my husband and I, and my sister and her family were there.  We rejoiced that as a Christian, her death actually brought life and healing to her ... but we miss her so, so much.